Neither Forgive nor Forget
by Diamondpink
Summary: Kagome develops amnesia after she has been in a car accident. While trying to remember her life, memories best left buried, comes to the surface via her dreams. Questions arise when trying to understand their meaning. Can Sesshomaru help his mate? Or will the past repeat itself? -The revision of "Kagome's Memories and Sesshomaru's Love"
1. Chapter 1

**Author's note: It has been five years since I first started writing KM when I realized that it needed **_**serious**_** editing, I decided to start over before I finished it …yes it was that bad. All you former fans, I would like to thank you for sticking with my former travesty and all ye new comers welcome! I would also like to thank my beta, Maryse! It would not be as good without you. You're the best! Well without further ado, here is the revised version of KM&SL.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own any rights of Inuyasha; the one who does is Rumiko Takahashi.**

**Prologue**

Not being able to concentrate on paperwork, Kagome put it away in her desk. After all, who could focus on the world's past when she was too excited about here and now. Leaving her office, Kagome felt like she was on cloud nine, as her excitement sored. Earlier, she received results from her doctor that she and Sesshomaru were expecting. Walking past the night guard of the museum, she said her good nights.

"Oh Mrs. Taisho, don't forget your umbrella," the night guard called to her.

"Thank you Akimaru-Kun," Kagome smiled, bowed, and walked out the door into the rain toward her car.

Entering her car, Kagome had an awful, vague feeling about leaving so soon. However her joy overpowered her fear and she left cautiously, keeping in mind the weather. Four blocks away from the museum, Kagome waited at the light and connected her Bluetooth to her phone to call her mate. After a long wait she hung up and realized that he must have been busy. Even more than usual, since he took major precautions to make sure his company is running like a well-oiled machine. Being the next in line to go, Kagome inched her car to the corner to turn when Sesshomaru called her back.

"Hello?" She answered, hardly able to contain her excitement.

"_You called a moment ago?" _he asked.

Kagome started chattering away about her day being careful not to spoil her surprise. "So can I expect you home in time for dinner?" Waiting for his answer she started to pull off, another car sped passed the red light and T-boned her car, crushing the driver side door on impact. The faint sounds of Sesshomaru frantically calling out to her could be heard over the phone.

Sesshomaru was one of the first to arrive to hospital, his mother-in-law with Kagome's grandfather and little brother arrived soon after. The family and friends sat in the waiting room; anxiously they waited for an update on Kagome's condition. Finally, a doctor appeared and announced her condition being better than what they expected it to be. The accident caused her to lose the child and due to the amount of blood loss from the hit, she reached a comatose state. While the relief of knowing she was relatively safe washed over them, the idea she had a miscarriage, made their heart ache.

Every day, family and friends visited her, telling her about their day and any major updates in their lives. However, the visits became more infrequent as the months went on and eventually only her mother made sure to see her. The thought of seeing Kagome so pale and virtually lifeless, made Sesshomaru too depressed, no matter how hard he tried to hide it.

Mrs. Higurashi stared at her daughter's seemingly lifeless body and grasped her hand. The doctors have asked for weeks now whether they should take her off life support and tomorrow they had to make their decision. Holding her hand tighter, she felt the stinging of her eyes and the warming of her cheeks, as tears began to fall down her face. _'No parent should have to bury their child,' _she repeated to herself in her mind. A soft gentle hand broke her out of her dreary thoughts. Turning around she noticed it was Izayoi; her smile was gentle and understanding. She and her husband walked the grief struck mother out of the room for a little break, while their son spent some time with his mate.

Sitting next to her, he too grasped her hand and gave it a small kiss. Since the doctors approached him about removing her life support weeks before, he sunk into a depression. Sitting there, he started to think back on their lives together from their first encounter to the last night, they had been discussing about starting a family. He smiled, the first time in months. "Kagome, if you can hear me, please come back to me sweetheart. I do not know if I could live without you. I love you." Whipping a lone tear from his cheek, he rose from his seat the longer he stayed the more depressed he became. Just as he turned the knob to leave her hospital room, he heard a faint whimper. Turning around, he watched her eyes flitter open. Calling out to his family and the nearby nurses, they all entered the room to check on Kagome's improved condition.

_**Chapter 1**_

_Kagome was in a realm of existence in her own mind- she was neither awake nor asleep, alive or dead; in her mind she was there but not at the same time. She wandered throughout her psyche, for what only seemed like a couple of minutes- hours at the most. _

_Every now and then, she would hear the murmurs of familiar voices speak to her, one voice in particular made her heart ache. That one voice, a man's, was cold and seemed to be without emotion but to her trained heart, Kagome could tell he was in pain. Kagome pondered what it would be like to talk to him- the others too, but mostly him. From what she could tell he care deeply about her; she could tell by how he held her hand and kissed it before he left. How she wished he would kiss her lips the same way. The female voice that seem so caring and motherly, came see to her everyday, brought a little happiness to her lonely existence, but it pained her whenever she didn't hear his voice for a long period of time. _

"Kagome, if you can hear me, please come back to me sweetheart. I do not know if I could live without you. I love you." _Drifting in her psyche, she heard his voice. It sounded more hurt than usual, more depressed and it made her worry. 'Something is not right. There must be something terribly wrong,' she thought and she had a feeling it was about her. With all the energy she could muster, she willed herself to back to the world she knew she should be a part of. _

Opening her eyes she saw an outline of a handsome man, his shoulders were broad his hair long and the air about him was solemn. Trying to speak, she let out a little whimper catching his attention. Slowly he turned around in fear of his imagination was playing tricks on him again; but the fates granted the desire of his heart him and noticed her eyes were open. "Kagome," he whispered and rushed to her side. Small tears formed around his eyes. Sesshomaru called the nurse in and the next thing he knew, the room filled with both their parents. Just as the excitement flooded the hospital room, Kagome's doctor entered and asked everyone to leave the room so that he may conduct some tests and he would get back to them as soon as he was done.

Mrs. Higurashi called her son and father-in-law to the hospital and Sesshomaru contacted their friends, Miroku and Sango, while his parents called their youngest son to the come to the hospital announcing that Kagome was awake. Soon the waiting room filled with anticipation waiting to hear the doctor's news. After about forty-five minutes, the doctor walked out of Kagome's room into the room filled to the brim with friends and family. He took a seat in front of Sesshomaru. It became quite as they waited to hear what he had to say.

"Mr. Taisho, I have good news and bad news."

"Well," Sesshomaru demanded, "tell us!"

"Well, Mr. Taisho, the good news is in the accident, she didn't suffer major brain injury…"

"But there was some?" Izayoi voiced.

"Yes, that's the bad news. I asked her a few basic, who she is; her birth year and who her parents are, but she told me she did not know. While the accident didn't, as far as we can see, hinder her speaking or thinking skills, it did however slightly damage the hippocampus in her temporal lobes."

"What does that mean?" Mrs. Higurashi asked next.

"The temporal lobes are right here," he started pointing to his temples, "right behind the eyes. They are in charge of short and long term memory storing, thought processing and mood stability. Inside the lobe, there is the hippocampus, this analyzed new information and memorized it. In extremely bad cases, once the hippocampus is damaged, the brain will never be able to store new information or retrieve old memories." Everyone listened intently to the doctor as he explained what was wrong. "In your wife's case, Taisho-san, nothing seems like there is any serious damage- more likely minor bruising. I would like to run a few more tests on her in order to get definitive results, and would like to keep her here longer to keep a close eye on her. More good news is she hasn't lost feeling in her lower body, I'll give you a list of physical therapist to look over so we can get her walking again; since she hasn't walked in months, she will need to strengthen those muscles. I may prescribe some sort of memory-enhancing medication as well as some sort of mood stabilizing medication, depending on her results. She's being prepped for that right now, and you will be able to see her when she comes out."

The waiting took forever. Miroku and Sango took Souta and his grandfather out to a little restaurant for some dinner, the Taishos, Touga and Izayoi took Mrs. Higurashi out as well, to get a small bite to eat and some coffee, only ones left in the waiting room was Sesshomaru and Inuyasha. Inuyasha wanted to break the uneasiness he felt being alone with his brother. "Sesshomaru, I'm gonna get some coffee, would ya like a cup?"

"No, I'm fine."

"What about a bite to eat? Mom, dad and Mrs. Higurashi have been worried that you haven't been eating much since they asked about taking Kagome off life support."

"Inuyasha, I know what you're trying to do but I'm not in the mood right now."

"Ptff, fine, but the folks'll kill me I didn't bring anything back for you. So what do you want me to get?"

Sesshomaru really wanted to sit in silence as he waited to hear news about his wife; he also realized that his brother was only trying to help. He sighed, "Surprise me."

With that, Inuyasha walked out the hospital and drove off. Just as he left the parking lot, his phone rang and he connected it with the Bluetooth. "Hello?"

"_How is she?" _A female voice asked over the phone.

"She's doing fine. Ya know you come see her."

"_I will when I have time."_

"That's always your excuse, I know for a fact you're not that busy, especially since you became a dance instructor."

"_That's not completely true; even though, I gave up most of my responsibilities at the company, I still look over it diligently making sure it is in proper working order."_

"Ptff, the same ol' Haru-chan. Hey I'm going out for a quick bite. Are ya too busy to join me?"

The voice over the phone sighed. _"I guess I could get a bite to eat, I am getting a bit hungry. Where should I meet you?"_

"I'll come get you."

"_No I have to go straight home; I have to get my girls ready for their competition."_

"Who says I won't take you straight home?"

"_I know you Inuyasha, and you won't. Tell you what, I'm still here at the studio, I'll meet you at the café not far from there."_

"Deal." He hung up the phone and before long; he was parking his car and walking into the café. Inuyasha told his friend the news regarding Kagome's condition, as well as other topics. When they were done eating, Inuyasha grabbed Sesshomaru something before leaving, saying their goodbyes, they went their separate ways.

Inuyasha reentered the hospital and handed Sesshomaru his meal. "How much do I owe you?"

"Don't worry about it. Were you able to see her?"

He nodded, "I did for a while, her family is in there right now." Sesshomaru opened the drink can Inuyasha bought him and started drinking. "Thank you."

"No problem."

**Thank you for reading! It may not be much so I'm gonna try and write some more hopefully before school starts back up again… not likely but I will try! XD**


	2. Chapter 2

**_Chapter 2_**

At almost one in the morning, Sesshomaru drove his car up the driveway and parked in the garage. It was late, too late for him to be coming home; Kagome would have chewed him out had she been there- but he only works to take his mind off the loneliness he felt not having someone to come home to anymore. Sesshomaru walked through the door of his home and placed his keys where they belonged. Walking up his stairs to his bedroom, he placed his hand on the back of his neck and twisted it from one side to the other. The hard soles of his shoes and the cracks of his neck echoed throughout the halls. Sesshomaru inwardly sighed at how quite his home became after the incident. Kagome would sometimes have the radio playing as she cooked, or the television playing in the background as she did some work at home- the house enveloped her in a silence and she did not like it. He missed the greetings he would get when he came home early- she would run to him and jump into his arms. Anyone who would see that only brushed it off as them still being newlyweds, but even after a year, she still met him with excitement.

He quietly walked into his room and started to take off his clothes and threw them on the floor haphazardly, he didn't care Jaken will pick them up and get them ready for the cleaners in the morning. Removing the hair tie from his head, he slowly walked over to the linen closet, and pulled out two fresh towels and walked into his bathroom to take a nice hot shower. As the water ran through his hair and his naked form, he imagined all the worries, all the tension drained away and down the drain along with the water - if only for a while.

Stepping out of the shower, he dried his hair and his body before slipping into a pair of sleeping pants. He sat on his side of the bed and thought about his visit with Kagome earlier in the day. He started smiling. Hearing her voice again was the best thing that happened to him since her accident. It seems that the Kamis were listening to his prayers after all.

Reaching over to his side table to turn off his lamp his wedding photo caught his attention. Out of all the pictures taken that day it was his favorite. He let a chuckle slip as he remembered what happened. Kagome was in a long white and lace dress that made her look stunning and her long wavy hair placed in a bun. The photographer asked for a kiss and when reaching his hand up to cup her face, he undid the bun making her hair fall perfectly down her shoulders. Before they knew it, a small gust of wind picked up and blew her hair off her shoulders. The picture came out really well; well enough in fact, many people deemed it as their favorite picture also.

Reaching back over to turn off his lamp he smiled once more before getting under the covers. Just as his eyes became too heavy to bear, Sesshomaru looked out the window to his left. The crescent moon gave off a vibrant glow that night that made him wonder if Kagome was in her hospital room, looking at the same moon, or thinking of him. As sleep overcame the daiyoukai, a smile reached his lips the third time that day.

Kagome sat in a quiet hospital room, her mind wandering all over the place. From the moment she woke up, to only a few hours ago, she met many people, people she supposedly knew. In her comatose state, she heard the voices of the people that came to visit her, and try as she might her mind refused to cooperate with her. It refused to allow her to dig within her memory and put a name to a face.

Kagome's gaze wandered throughout the hospital room once again. To her right there were vases full of flowers and balloons and stuffed animals saying "Get Well Soon". To her left there was a chair where her mate sat and a big window. The curtains were wide open so she could see the moon and a few stars out; the moon was in its crescent form tonight. It was thin like the one on top of the demon she supposedly mated. Her mind roamed thinking about the day's events.

Since she woke, Kagome's head became flooded with thoughts and emotions. They mostly landed on him and his beautiful face. How she could not remember him she did not understand. Who would forget a face, or voice, or body, or kindness like his? Soon she felt her eyes grow heavy from the morphine they gave her for some of the pain she was feeling. Resting her head on her pillow, she prayed to the heavens above that they will give her back her memories.

As her eyes drifted closed, Kagome slipped into the darkness she knew all too well, but it gave her a little comfort to know she will awake in a few hours.

~*~*~_Dream_~*~*~

_Kagome was shrouded in darkness, one so thick she could feel it. She tried to move her limbs but they would not budge. She tied to scream to the top of her lungs, but not a noise trickled out of her throat. She sat in a panic, a deep sinister voice echoing around her, chilling her to the bone. Kagome never felt more terrified in her life. The hard soles of his shoes became louder and louder as he approached her. "My Kagome, my sweet little Kagome. I hate seeing you like this, hurting_ _you like this, but you gave me no choice. They say my dear, 'Forgive and forget', but I much rather do neither. How does one forget breaking someone's heart like you did? And, for that matter, how do you forgive the person that caused you that pain…"_

_"I'm so sorry!" Kagome interrupted, hot tears stinging her face. "I didn't mean to hurt you! I thought I was doing the right thing by not try to string you along anymore! I- "_

_The man grabbed her roughly by the cheeks with one hand. The pressure he was placing on her caused her to cut the inside of her cheeks with her teeth. She could not see it but he smiled at her pain, a smile that intensified after he slapped her across her face. Her tears flowed rapidly down her face. He was basking in her misery, knowing she was in pain made him almost as giddy as a school boy. He kneeled down before her and removed her blindfold, and her eyes slowly adjusted to what little light that was around them; when they did, she witnessed the sheer evil that possessed this man. There, a mere five feet away, sat Sesshomaru. He was severely beaten, and seemingly unconscious. Sutras placed around him so his healing powers wouldn't take effect. You could hear the strain in his breathing, possibly from damaged lungs. Despite him being a powerful Daiyoukai, he wouldn't survive much longer. "Kukuku, look my pet, at how the mighty hath fallen." The man stalked passed Sesshomaru and grabbed a crowbar, returned and started to beat him. Sesshomaru screamed in pure anguish as he received more another blow from his tormentor. "Oh? What's the matter, hum? The big bad mutt can't take a hit?" The beating continued until Kagome screamed for him to stop. _

_"Please, please stop this!" Kagome slumped over where she sat and bawled. _

_There was a loud clanking noise where the crowbar hit the ground. "Well, my sweet, I am not without mercy, since you said 'please' and everything. Tell you what, I'll give you the choice Erik gave Christine and Raoul, you can either: stop this madness right now and run away with me and I set him free _or_ you can leave this place and send your lover to his early grave." Removing the gun from his pants, the man cocked back the hammer and aimed the gun at the nearly dying man on the floor in front of him. "Choose wisely baby. I can assure you this story will not have a happy ending either way."_

_"Kagome," Sesshomaru's cracking voice strained. "Kagome, run away from here, I'll be fine." _

_"No! I can't- I won't leave you!" Kagome screamed back._

_"Awww, how precious. You hear that dog? She's not willing to leave your side. But I'm fine with that. This means I can kill you now!" As soon as those words left his lips, the gun went off. Kagome closed her eyes and screamed._

~*~*~_Dream_~*~*~

Kagome screamed and thrashed against the hospital bed. Nurses rushed in to subdue her, giving her a sedative to calm her down.

**Sorry it isn't much. But I did try and make it longer I swear, but alas my muse arrived and abandoned me in one day. T~T**


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